tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25093239730258116402024-03-13T21:21:41.871+08:00♥ hffasnh ♥TakenByAAbdulSamadnispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.comBlogger112125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-17784925481556828202016-11-18T02:15:00.001+08:002016-11-18T02:15:50.834+08:00its hurts to the unbearble limit<br />
hanis afifah dah tak sekuat dulu, hanis afifah mudah mengalah, mudah tunduk, mudah kalah, i miss the old me. hanis afifah yang hatinya tak boleh dipijak, hanis afifah yang keras, hanis afifah yang tak peduli hal orang. tapi hanis afifah tu terlalu kejam at some point which aku bersyukur hanis afifah tu dah takdak.<br />
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kenapa aku tahan segala perit ni. sebab yang salah tu aku. sebab aku sayang. sayang hubungan ni, sayang segala kenangan, sayang segala pahit yang dah lepas, sayang segala bahagia bersama, sayang perangai dia, sayang diri dia, aku sayang dia. sebab tu dari dulu, sakit macam mana pun, apa punca pun, aku masih bertahan. sebab aku sayang segalanya. aku terima apa ja, asalkan dengan dia.<br />
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bila jadi macam ni rasa mcm hilang hrapan on apa yg km plan utk tahun depan. mcm tak nampak pun semua tu. bukan aku give up, cuma aku taknak terlalu berharap. nanti aku yg kecewa. tahun ni banyak aku baca pasal bertunang dengan org lain last2 tunang lari. aku takut aku end up jadi macam tu.<br />
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he wont understand any of this, dia lelaki. dia takkan faham. yg pasti semua ni berpunca dari aku. salah aku malam tu. nanti mesti dia kata aku asyik buat salah yang sama. abdul samad bukan jenis yang dengaq explaination, apa dia pegang itu lah. aku salah maka apa jua reasoning pun, aku tetap salah. pastu kalau aku busy nanti dia kata aku takdak effort pulak, pastu nanti dia kata dia dah mula tawaq hati. mcm tahun lepas.<br />
<br />nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-67598288712249375832016-11-18T02:05:00.001+08:002016-11-18T02:05:28.893+08:00abdul samad, why you do this. kenapaaaaaaaaa. urghhh sakitnya tahan rasa bila kena bluetick. stil bersabaq sebab dia kat kem skrg. kalau dak dah lama lepas dah. tak tahan lah macam ni, dia busy time relay tengah kacau ni. jadi tak tenteram. yelah i admit its my fault. dah mintak maaf dah, tapi taktau dia dah maaf or tak.<br />
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sakit siyh rasa bila kena silent treatment ni. dah la takdak sapa nak luah. reaction dia selalu hambar ja, he didnt seem excited about me anymore. its hurt, its hurt so much. i couldnt focus on anything at all. kelas dah berapa dah skip, kalau dia tau ni konfem kena marah pulak. tapi sumpah takleh focus langsung, buat apa pi kelas kan.<br />
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dari ahad mcm ni, silent treatment. boleh ws ja, i am not allowed to call him. its hurt, im crying every night. awal2 haritu setakat tengok gambaq sekejap2 ja. ni dah masuk tahap siang malam tengok gambaq pastu peluk pastu riyau. ah sudahh, cemana nii. hujung2 sem ni dah la hard time, tak tahan ahh ceni.<br />
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haritu ayah call, cakap dengan ayah, mula2 takmau ngadu, pastu tak tahan, ngadu trus. start ja kata 'ayah, stress la' ayaq mata dah dah turun dah. lama jugak la dok sob sob sob sambil cakap dengan ayah, ayah last2 kata ceni ja 'kak time mcm ni kak fokus study jelah, benda2 yg lain tu takpayah pikiaq pun' ayah mcm tau tau aku stress bukan sebab study pun sebenaqnya<br />
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tapi sumpah stress sangat, project kena kejan, esaimen tak jalan takdak idea, business plan techno, final project english tak gerak, tak berapa hari nak start test 2 dah. time ceni aku perlu kan support tapi jadi pulak problem ceni. allah sungguh hati ni tak kuat sangat. lemah sangat. <br />
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<br />nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-33331127114610752402016-11-15T00:36:00.001+08:002016-11-15T00:36:42.294+08:00Year End Crisis12 Nov 2016(9.30p.m)<br />
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okey aku dah habaq aku nak keluaq malam tu, nak keluaq makan megi keta dgn sir usop poji haziq. habaq dh kat mad. k takpa la kan, malam tu nk keluaq aku call berkali kali kali kali, sekali pun tak angkat, pastu aku siap msg dia kata aku nak keluaq dah. pastu takpa la, dalam pukul 10.15 bru gerak dari pekan sebab poji pi beli ayaq kopi blended pa benda tuu. pastu masa otw tu depa tak lalu kot tanjung lumpur, pastu masa tu baru la aku tanya kita ni nakpi mana sebenaqnya nya, baru la usop bagitau yg nakpi ECM sebab sir belanja tgk wayang (Dr. Strange) pastu sampai ECM tgk yaya pun ada. ok takpa la so maknanya km 6 org. yes aku tak bagitau mad, sebab aku tak pegang fon langsung. sembang dgn sir pa semua, tanya sir wyg start pkul berapa, sir kata 11.30, so aku dgn haziq pi toilet dlu sebab bru pkul 11.10, keluaq toilet dlm 11.20, pastu km pun masuk wyg, dok dalam wayang sembang pa semua sementara nak start cerita. aku langsung tak pegang fon.<br />
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pastu keluaq ja wyg aku dh pening sebab masuk angin. terus keluaq pi toilet sebab rasa nak muntah. tgk pulak toilet cm harem lagi laaaa tak kebuloq nak muntah. pastu pi kt keta, usop bukak keta and aku dgn haziq masuk dlm keta sebab aku dh pening. pastu sir kata jumpa sana, maknanya jumpa kt kedai megi ketam la. pastu elok ja keta jalan aku kata kt usop satgi cari 7e sebab nak beli soya. pastu singgah 7e n lost track dgn sir, masa tu dlm pkul 2 lebih, bukak ws pastu tgk ada ws mad, dia kata lama makan rancak apa benda tah, kira dia perli laa, aku kenai sgt mad tuu. pastu aku balas la kata baru pas tgk wyg, pastu ttiba dia balas clap hand punya emoji and dia kata sweet la tuu. aku dh blur dh, sweet kebenda deni, keluaq ramai2 kot. so aku rasa salah aku mula kt situ la, so berlarutan la sampai skrg. esoknya call tak agkat, siap reject lagi, pehh nasib pak aku yg bayaq bill, kalau tolak kdt aku mau aku mencarut. satu call pun tak agkat. masa tu aku mcm dh faham dah dia marah teruk, ws mintak maaf tak balas, dpt bluetick ja.<br />
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Mad treat aku mcm ni maknanya teruk la condition relation km ni, Tahun lepas benda cm ni lah yg lead kepada benda yg jadi masa bulan 2 tu. YA ALLAH aku harap sgt benda tu tak jadi lagi, aku dh tak kuat nak hadapi semua tu. Aku takut bila jad mcm ni dia jadi sunyi, and dia mula ws pmpuan2 tu balik mcm dulu, dulu benda mcm ni jadi sebab berpunca dr isu yg sama la, and mula hujung tahun jugak, situasi macam ni. Aku harap sgt tak jadi mcm haritu. Aku plan benda besaq dah tahun depan. Kalau tak jadi mana aku nak letak muka aku. Mana aku nak lari, Aku harap dia tak buat keputusan nak tinggal kan aku ja. Takpa aku terima kalini kalau dia ada yg lain, cuma harap dia tak tinggal kan aku. Amek la aku dulu, pastu nak gantung tak bertali ka apapa ka buat lah. Cuma jangan tinggalkan aku.nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-22620774269567839082016-10-12T01:17:00.000+08:002016-10-12T01:17:02.502+08:00Wow hebat sangat abdul samad, hanis afifah yang terasa, yang menitik air mata, hanis afifah jugak yang mintak maaf. Untung jadi abdul samad, takdak mood tidoq. Sedangkan hanis afifah menangis teresak esak sorang sorang. Dah la rindu tak berbalas, menangis tak dilayan. Mintak maaf pulak atas sebab buat abdul samad marah. Hebat betul abdul samad, superior sangat.<br />
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Congratulations abdul samad sebab dah berjaya bodohkan hanis afifah.Hanis afifah ni sapalah kan untuk diberi perhatian, cuma insan picisan yang menagih rindu. Sedangkan rindu tak berbalas, ada hati berangan nak layanan istimewa hanis afifah? Simpan jelah semua tu. Layan jelah perasaan sorang sorang. Dah la kata maaf tak diungkap, boleh pulak anggap macam nothing happen. Habis hati aku yang kecamuk ni apa?<br />
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Lagi 3 hari birthday aku, layan aku special tak boleh ka, aku tak mintak hadiah weh, mintak pun tau tak dapat, aku mintak layan aku special sikit ja, aku mintak nyanyi kt aku tu nyanyi jelahh, pastu tak payah la nak sakitkan hati aku soal perempuan lain. Ni tak, mintak nyanyi pun susah.<br />
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Dah lama kita tak borak cakap lama2, imbau kenangan, semua lahh. Aku nak tu ja, ni tak. Aku tau la aku sorang ja ada perasaan rindu ni. Cuma simpati la sikit kt aku ni, aku nak hadapi test masa birthday aku, pastu celebrate sorang sorang kat sini, without hang without family.<br />
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Lol menjelang 21 ni semua kena berdikari rupanya, no wonder hati pun kena pujuk senirinispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-8115105497331571572016-10-09T21:23:00.004+08:002016-10-09T21:23:43.328+08:00Atok<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Well bulan ke 9 without atuk, mcm dh boleh biasa kan diri, tapi
bila duk lama2 balik teringat jaa, menyesal sangat, sepatutnya masa cuti sem
bulan 1 tu duk ja terus rumah opah, boleh ada dengan atuk lama2. rindu sangat
nak lap badan atuk, nak sapukan bedak kt badan atuk, nak suap atuk makan, rindu
nak pegang tangan atuk. rindu weh nak sapu minyak kt kulit atuk yg kering. ya
allah rindu sangat semua tuu, tapi yelah, atuk terlantar sakit lama dah, lama
sangat atuk macam tu sampai adik hakiem takdak pun memori masa atuk tengah
sihat. sedangkan aku ni, ingat lagi masa kecik2 tinggal umah opah, ikut atuk
hantaq opah pi ngaji, ikut atuk pi kedai, naik basikal atuk. atuk minat bola,
minat sangat, bila ada game bola kat rumah mmg takleh tukaq channel. pastu bila
team dia sokong gol, pehhh dengaq satu rumah dia jerit. aku paling menyesal aku
takdak gambaq dgn atuk masa dah besaq ni. benda yg paling aku menyesal sangat
sekarang ni, sebab aku cuma ada gambaq dgn atuk masa aku kecik ja, and almost
semua gambaq aku dgn atuk, atuk pandang aku bukan kamera, pandangan penuh kasih
sayang, aku rindu atuk, rindu sangat ya allah. yelah masa bulan puasa lah aku
teringat, sebab tak buleh terima weh, tahun ni first raya without atuk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-29381244116888822042016-10-09T20:55:00.002+08:002016-10-09T21:10:44.915+08:00<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">okey sambung...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Julai<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Err apa ek julai, ohhh raya, emm tahun ni raya pahangggggg, dakcik
keisha tu adaaa. baju rasa sama tema dgn keisha soooo kami amek gambaq dgn
keisha</span></div>
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emm hala balik tuu lalu kot fraser hill, ya
tohan masa turun tu mabuk nak mampuih baq hg, seyes tak tipu. </div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">bulan 7 ni mcm
banyak crita jaaa, keluaq tiap2 minggu pi open house, km pun buat open house,
tapi yg mai ciput ja, sedih aku, aku pi raya rumah org org takmai rumah aku,
pasni takmau buat dah. emm pastu pastu apa lagi ekkk. haaaaaaaaaa, abdul samad
bagi hadiahhhhh :D singgah sunway pastu lalu kedai bear, dia tanya nak bear tak
ganti bantal tu, pastu kata kt dia seyes ka, dia tanya nak tak, aku jawab la
awat nak beli ka, pastu trus dia masuk kedai tuu, dia kata nak yg jenih macam
mana, ahahahah aku seyes dok blur, pastu dia kata nk jenih sma mcm bantal tu
ka, aku kata takmau nanti dia lembik lgi, so dia belikan aku benda lain, mula2
dia pilih hat kecik, pastu dia kata nk kecik ka besaq aku kata la nak hat besaqq,
pastu aku tgk harga 80 hengget teroih aku kata eh takyah laa, mahai, dia tanya
lagi nak tak, aku kata laa mesti la nak, dia kata ha amek, nak kaler apa, luls
ku pilih kaler aku nakk, hihihihi, pastuuu dia pun bayaq. jalan keluaq dr kedai
plak lalu kedai aksesori, pastu dia tanya nak cincin tak, aku kt belakang ni
dah terharu terkesima dah, aku kata laa "ish biaq betoi kenapa, takyah
laa" pastu dia dok pilih2 design suh aku pilih gak, pastu aku pilih la
design aku nak, dia teroih bayaq, wehh masa tuu ya allah aku taktau nak kata
terharu mcm mana, yelah tau la abdul samad kann. bukan jenih dok bagi bagi
hadiah semua ni kan. aku ni terharu tahap nak bergenang ayaq mata laa. pastu
sampai kt keta aku punya seronok, tak habih habih dok kelebek cincin kt tangan,
rasa mcm dok kt kayangan oooo.pastu masa otw nak hantaq aku balik tu aku beria
tanya kenapa beli bear cincin semua, kenapa membazir mcm ni, kalau ada duit tu
baik simpan utk masa depan, aku kata cmtu. pastu dia kata biaq la bukan selalu,
bukan banyak pun, tak sampai seratus pun dia perabih kt aku, pastu aku kata
laa, mmg la tapi dekat seratus, banyak dh tuuu. pastu dia kata takpa, dia mmg
nk ganti cincin pun sebab aku dok bising dia pakai cincin tengkorak tuu. pasal
bear pulak dia nak ganti bantal merah tuu sebab dh lama sangat, aku asyik dok
ngadu lembik la koyak la lubang laa. so dia belikan ganti baruu </span></div>
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konon jela ganti, sudah nya aku bwk mai dua dua kt ump, bantal merah tu
kira anak first aku laa, ada anak hat number dua pun aku tetap sayang number
satu. peluk dua dua oii tiap malam. punya aku hargai lah setiap benda dia bagi.
tapi masa nak bawak balik tu sumbat dalam luggage penuh dia jaa --' beg jadi
banyak sebab dia penuh satu luggage --' takpa anak, demi anak anak mak rela ja
asalkan kita sentiasa bersama<o:p></o:p><br />
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nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-91462126221650441262016-10-09T03:33:00.000+08:002016-10-09T21:03:55.341+08:00last post was on Feb --' so many things to update. i'll remember the sequences<br />
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<u>March</u><br />
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well the highlight for sure his birthday and our anniversary. well its our 4th anniversary. alhamdulillah after everything happen we still manage to stay calm (ya clam lah sangat kan --')<br />
emm as for his birthday and our anniversary are just a day apart so tahun ni i send him my handmade present. kalau sebelum sebelum ni selalu order pastu letak alamat dia. tahun ni i've decide to made it myself. aaaa nampak ikhlas and effort sikit. untuk tahun ni aku bagi dia gambaq kami yg aku cuci on instax polaroid dgn chocolate favourite dia. aku letak dalam box kt belah bwh skali letak polaroid in between bubble wrap as first layer, pastu second layer aku susun 8 bijik ferrero rocher, and pastu utk penuh kan ruang and tutup ferrero tuu aku taboq mini white toblerone banyak2 sampai tak nampak fererro dah, pastu atas tuu letak bubble wrap lagi and tabur sampah kertas aku koyak2 nak bagi kotak tu penuh and susunan coklat tak gerak hihihhi. pastu pos senyap senyap, sampai masa hari dia nak balik, pastu masa tu dia takdak kt umah plak, maka dia kena tggu ptg baru buleh amek, tergendala lah dia nak balik haritu, dia balik esok pagi tuuu. well coklat tuu as hadiah birthday dia, polaroid pulak as memory sebagai hadiah anniversary.<br />
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<u>April</u><br />
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err nothing happen rasanya. sebab serious tak ingt apa. gaduh tu rasanya tiap2 bulan ada gaduh kot. plan diet mcm biasa kelaut ja sebab asyik keluaq makan :)<br />
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<u>May</u><br />
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emm bulan 6 dah nak puasa kan, dan sebagai manusia yg pemalas, bulan 5 lah masanya nak berlumba2 puasa ganti ahahahaha. mcm apa weh kira sempat ganti tak sebelum next period bagai. tapi ok selamat laa sempat :D<br />
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<u>Jun</u><br />
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puasa emmm, tahun ni berjaya bukak puasa dgn donut gebus tapi syarlyn takdak. km bukak posa kt de'pauh garden rasanya, pastu pi solat kt masjid kt pmtg pauh, pastuuuu pi sunway, pi setarbak uolss ahahahhaa. lol gambaq pi mana habih taktau laa.<br />
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nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-8597722809507623392016-02-22T23:27:00.000+08:002016-02-22T23:27:04.027+08:004 years<div style="text-align: center;">
wow, its been 4 years. well almost.</div>
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makin lama makin masalah timbul</div>
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betul ayah kata</div>
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dugaan bila bertunang ni pelik2</div>
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masing2 jadi cepat nak naik angin</div>
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aku pun makin tak sabar</div>
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ya allah, jenuh nak sedarkan balik diri ni</div>
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dulu masa bercinta kemain indah saja</div>
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lately ni masing2 cepat nak marah</div>
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especially lepas kes haritu</div>
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ayahh, cemna nak kuat ni ayah<br />
kenapa la kak tak dengaq cakap mak ayah<br />
jangan bercinta time belajaq<br />
ni lah jadinya<br />
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ayah, kak kuat sebab kak anak ayah :') </div>
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nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-9386830069661507882016-02-22T23:25:00.004+08:002016-02-22T23:25:56.938+08:00selalu aku tahan, jarang lah aku luah cemburu ni<br />
<br />
14feb2016<br />
bila aku dah tak mampu tahan, aku luah. bukan cuma luahan dimulut, dimata pun terluah.<br />
dah macam drama melayu aku rasa bila ingt balik. hahaha. bukan apa, cuma nak mempertahankan hak aku. then masa tu jugak dia sedarkan aku, yg dia bukan hak aku lagi. terdiam seketika, yelah, benda tu betul. selama hampir 4 tahun ni, aku yg anggap lebih. ya mmg betul belum official selagi belum sah. tapi biasa lah, aku perempuan. bila dah bagitau ayah pasal bertunang semua, mestilah harapan tinggi.<br />
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hanis, kemonn, sedaq diri hanis. hang tu cuma cebisan kecik ja. kalau dia standard fererro rocher, hg cuma standard roka ja, jangan nak perasan sangat. takpa, sayang berhabisan takpa, hg buktikan yg terbaik, selebihnya terpulang kat dia. hati org bukan boleh dipaksa. tambah lagi hati org tu. org tu mmg jenis tak suka dipaksa nis. sedaq sikit semua tu. nis jangan terlalu berharap nis, takut hg yg terluka. yg penting hg jaga diri sudah lah.<br />
<br />
curang<br />
lain org lain definisi curang<br />
aku pegang definisi curang is bila hg flirt dgn org lain belakang partner hg<br />
tak kesah la kapel dak dgn org tu, once hg dh flirt tu bagi aku curang<br />
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kalau ya pun nak flirt, flirt la dgn org yg tak kenai aku weyy. jgn la dok flirt dgn org yg kenai aku, malu aku wey. nanti org kata aku tak pandai jaga hg. padahal aku ni beria jaga hati aku wehh. tipu la kalau aku kata takdak org nak flirt dgn aku, ada ja, aku tolak wey. sebab apa, sebab aku nak jaga hati hg. setiap kali aku ws abg agkt aku aku habaq, aku ws ex aku aku habaq. kira baguih aku tak buat benda belakang hg wey. pastu hg ingt habih isu tu aku tak nangis? wey dari form5 dh berkali kali hg buat aku riyau wey. aku ni tiap kali lepas solat doa urusan jodoh kita dipermudahkan. hg sedap2 buat aku mcm ni. sakit wey sakit. hg marah aku berminggu2 ungkit pasai poji tu. padahal benda tu aku tk buat pun, aku tak keluaq pun dgn dia. dan km tak ws private pun, benda tu terang2 kt fb. benda yg semua org nampak, aku tak sorok apa pun. kemain hg marah aku pasai tu, ungkit mcm apa lg haritu. ni bila pasai hg, aku ungkit sikit terus moody. sumpah aku nak sangat mengadu kat ayah aku apa hg buat kt aku weh. ayah aku bela aku dari kecik elok2 bukan nak bagi aku riyau sebab hg. penat weh penat. seminggu riyau. sepbek aku tak kurus ja, kalau aku kurus mesti org ingt aku sakit. nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-36140888253523959702015-12-24T03:25:00.000+08:002015-12-24T03:25:01.211+08:00terfikirkadang aku terfikir, kenapa dia sanggup stay dengan aku,<br />
sebab sayang atau rasa bersalah<br />
sebab ikhlas atau terpaksa<br />
<br />
andai kata aku ditakdirkan pergi dulu, apa reaksi dia,<br />
rasa sedih ka happy<br />
rasa kecewa ka lega<br />
rasa kehilangan ka hilang beban<br />
<br />
bukan aku nak jiwang, cuma terkadang aku hairan<br />
mengapa masih bertahan sedang ramai lebih menawan<br />
<br />
ikhlas aku kata kan<br />
aku bersyukur masih diberi perhatian<br />
walau agak berkurangan<br />
namun masih punya harapan<br />
<br />
terima kasih aku ucapkan <br />
semoga kita bertahan<br />
menempuh segala halangannispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-22935470598025223772015-12-20T03:24:00.001+08:002015-12-20T03:26:08.392+08:00Fasa P.E.M.U.L.I.H.A.N<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>PEMULIHAN </b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white;"><b> </b><span style="font-size: x-small;">kami masih dalam fasa pemulihan. since hari kejadian perkara tersebut, which is sebulan berlalu. benda ni masih belum setel. herhhh its tough -- tipu lah kalau cakap tak pernah terfikir nak give up kan. especially bila dia ckp dia dah tawaq hati. feeling tu allah ja tau. yelah bayang kan, since dari hari kejadian, ofkos i took some effor nak pulih kan everything, but everything doesnt seem to work out. till one night we take time to talk again about it. and that night is the night that scares me to death. as im scared that he actually going to say he cant pretend to stay with me anymore. we were on skype when we discuss bout it. </span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">it 2 december 2015 the date that we discuss </span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #444444;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">[02-Dec-2015 10:14:45 PM] sam__mad: abg rsa mngkin abg dah start tawaq hati<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:15:05 PM] sam__mad: tapi abg syg ayg... </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #444444;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">[02-Dec-2015 10:17:56 PM] sam__mad: hm...1.abg dah kurang percya kat ayg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:18:29 PM] sam__mad: 2. abg mls nak pikiaq dah masa depan<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:18:37 PM] sam__mad: abg follow the flow<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:01 PM] sam__mad: 3. nak wat bnda pnting shja<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:13 PM] sam__mad: 4.nak manage diri abg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:19 PM] sam__mad: kalau ayg nak abg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:23 PM] sam__mad: wat cranak<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:27 PM] sam__mad: xmau wat cra xmau<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:19:34 PM] sam__mad: simple<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:20:06 PM] sam__mad: yg tu atas ayg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:20:14 PM] sam__mad: so kalau dah smple sng wat<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:20:37 PM] sam__mad: kalau abg bleh wat ayg pon bleh<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:20:48 PM] sam__mad: it seem abg dah bg kbbsan n ayg salah guna<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:21:08 PM] sam__mad: abg rsa pasai kat ayg la nak wat apa pon<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:21:17 PM] sam__mad: abg bkn jenis kongkong<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:21:39 PM] sam__mad: kongkong abg pda hak mutlak abg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:22:03 PM] sam__mad: n abg rsa lps kes tu kita dah renggang<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:22:35 PM] sam__mad: abg xnmpak effort ayg yg sungghu nak pulihkn trust abg<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:22:51 PM] sam__mad: wlaupon ada effort<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:04 PM] sam__mad: tp bnda kprcyaan mmg bsaq skit<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:13 PM] sam__mad: ayg sndri akui<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:14 PM] sam__mad: sshkn<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:28 PM] sam__mad: tp manusia kan smua wat silap<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:34 PM] sam__mad: then rengang n rengang<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:23:40 PM] sam__mad: n i feel empty<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:24:03 PM] sam__mad: but i can manage it with sleeping each day n play game<br />[02-Dec-2015 10:24:31 PM] sam__mad: abg dah start tawaq hati syg </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;">as i read what he wrote, i was in shock. yelahs apa tak terkejut. dia siap mention dengan jelas yg dia dah tawaq hati. rasa takut masa tu allah ja tau. takut di tinggalkan mcm tu ja.masa tu siap pikaq, betul ka dia masih bertahan sebab sayang, ka sebab lain. kalau ikut kanmasa tu nak ja kata, kalau dah tak suka jangan paksa diri. buat apa yg patut asalkan bahagia. tapi bila pikiaq balik nanti aku yg merana. sor i decide to console him. slowly. then we talk until we manage to be happy again.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;">then this week i was quite busy. like really busy. i cant text him as much as i do. i guess that what make he feel lonely again, then he posted on his wechat moments' that the gap return. allah hu rabbi, my heart was crushed. how could he say dat. i havent go out for like 3 week because of him. i shut my self from my friend who i always go out with. then after 3 week we just go out for 1 night to celebrate last day of class this sem, and since that day we dont feel like we used to. dah tak mesra mcm selalu. takrasa feeling kasih sayang tu salah every text. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;">lately ni bila ckp pasal married, engagement, dia kata tak rasa mcm terlalu awal ka, kita go on ikut flow ja. that shocked me the most as he is the one who said that he want babies, he want to be with me and so on. but when i started to tell him the plan he say just follow the flow. duhhh mana ada flow nya kalau tak plan. rasa mcm syiok seniri. lastly skrg ni sampai i rasa nak biaq ja. takmau plan apapa. biaq kat dia, kalau dia betul2 serious nak suh dia pi ckp seniri dgn parent i.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;">tapi takleh blah pasal gap feeling ni. mana tak rasa gap nya. dah kalau aku ja asyik kena wish morning. kalau malam, asal dia ngantuk ja nak tidoq. abeh yg aku selama ni dok tahan mata tunggu dia segala tu apa. aku ckp aku rindu pun dh mcm takdak makna ja. respon tak eksaited pun. kdg2 rasa mcm aku ni ja dok syiok seniri dlm hubungan ni. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;">emm i guess it started again, i have to take more effort. i have to keep it up. may allah give me strength. wuuuu fighting hanis</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: #ea9999;"><span style="background-color: white;"> </span></span> </span></span><b><span style="background-color: white;"></span> </b></span></span></span></div>
nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-51853609975302709892015-12-02T20:21:00.002+08:002015-12-02T20:21:06.428+08:00GAP<div style="text-align: center;">
i feel like there a gap between us. since the day that you mad at me. there is always a gap. </div>
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the words you throw at me. its hurting me.<br /><br /> i admit i hurt you first. but you keep mentioning it. it hurt me every time. </div>
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every single time you remind me to it. it hurt me inside. <br /><br />i feel like all those effort i did to win your heart back are useless. i feel like you purposely remind me of it to tell me that you wont forget what i did to you. </div>
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will you let it go. i admit it was my fault. please just let it go. and let me keep showing you my effort. its been few times you said to me if i couldnt handle it i can give up</div>
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dayummm, are you crazy? after these 4 damn years then you want me to give up?? after what we've been thru then you want me to give up?? after what we did you want to give up??</div>
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if i want to give up i can do it long before</div>
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others than my family, you are the reason why i keep shine everyday i wake up. but now i lost it. i couldnt shine as i was before</div>
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wow, never realized you had a great effect in my life.</div>
nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-70198451084713372392015-11-04T15:28:00.000+08:002015-11-04T15:28:05.338+08:00la tahzan innallaha ma'ana<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-77483958869155148182015-11-04T15:14:00.000+08:002015-11-04T15:28:54.788+08:00it will never be the samei broke his heart, i made him disappointed. i was supposed to take care of myself because we are staying a part from each other. yet i didnt do that. i broke my promise toward him. i guess he coulnt forgive me. it was my fault, treating others to nice without thinking bout him. without thinking it will made him look like he cant take care of me. allahhurabbi, what have i done. i know it will never be the same anymore, im just afraid he just pushing himself to be nice with me. im afraid if he starting to hate me. hanis why you so stupid? why wouldnt i die earlier so that i dont have to hurt him. after all this time, almost 4 years, i am the one who ruin what we've built together. stupid hanis. even if i cry till my eyes blind, it wont change anything. its happen already. i am stupid. i am trying to win his heart back, but he said yesterday that it will never be the same. then i said, its oke, even he have to push himself, as long as he is by my side. i guess i am selfish. after what ive done i still want him to stay. stupid hanis. but i just cant loose him. after everything, i just cant let him go. im afraid i will go crazy. allah, how am i going to win his heart again. what if he didnt want to pick me up at ipoh? i guess i have to prepare if i need to buy other ticket. what if he come, but he hate me? he might hating me even more by just seeing my face. allah, there is so many things might happen. i just couldnt think straight. i am so not ready for test and quizzes. how can i get ready if i keep thinking of what happen. hanis why you so stupid. what if he doesnt want to see my face, it might get awkward. what if he wont let me touch him anymore? wow, so many thing might happen. but the one i afraid the most is he hates me and wont let me touch him. what if he doesnt love me anymore. what will happen to me. i might just become crazy. in fact i guess im going crazy thinking all of this. i didnt even study for tonight test. mom, dad im sorry. its my fault my life become like this. i should've listen to you to never fall in love during study. im sorry im going to disapoint you guys with my result. i guess i wont be the best sister for adik2. im thinking of leaving everyone to stop disapoint people anymore. but it will hurt my family more. i just cant think of anything. i feel so lifeless. its like my life has no point, its like i wasnt meant to make anyone happy. im just keep hurting the one i love, and the one who love me. i guess i have no function to stay in this world. ya allah, please make me stronger. dont let me do stupid things again. nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-13126633555717185322015-11-04T00:20:00.002+08:002015-11-04T00:20:09.867+08:003y 7m 3wits been more than 3 years. allah how fast time flies. i didnt even realise this. alhamdulillah. for all this time, we manage to face everything. abg youve been a great partner to me. you manage to sabaq with all my karenah. thank you abg for all this thing. you gave me so much happiness. there is nothing more i can ask for you. i just want you to stay with me forever. nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-46930272828579940632015-03-31T03:38:00.001+08:002015-03-31T03:38:42.184+08:00Yes he was my crush. Now? He become my partnerIts been almost a month since our third year anniversary. Alhamdulillah, we still counting together. There been several misunderstanding between both of us since my last post. But yet we manage to handle it. What I found interesting is he becoming more open toward me. He willing to express his feeling either he is mad or what. And the best part of all we never argue more then 12hours. We both can control and be patient. Im so lucky to have him<br />
<br />
Well lately I love to do some memories flashback with him. Especially during school time. So many bad things we've done during school time<br />
<br />
Well we mostly talk about our most precious memories such as how he proposed me, since when im having crush on him, bout all the things than ive done just to impress him, try to fulfill all his wishes, our 1st date, how we managed to keep our relay as secret for a month, how jealous I am when he talks to others, how impress I am to his intelligence, how happy I am to know him, how lucky iam to fall in love with my best friend<br />
<br />
Well as a guys he forget most of it. So once in a while we will have a long conversation and I will tell him all of this. I really hope he will remember when I tell him many time because im afraid if anything happen and I forget about him. I want him to be able remind me to our memories and promises.<br />
<br />
I really hope to love him always. I might cried cuz of him some time but he knows how to cheer me. No matter what he do I will support him. I love him, I really do.nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-37735787064479248322014-12-06T22:02:00.001+08:002014-12-06T22:02:49.994+08:00its been a weekso its been a week since he went to johor . he went for his LI . im pleased dat his doin fine there . he seem great this 1 week . but ill still be watching him<br />
<br />
well at first , when i know he decided to go to johor he really piss me off . i was ' wu da hell are u doin man, i knw yr ex is there, you really wanna go there ? u wanna be with her or wut' . yaa i knw , im jealous as hell . but then i realise im holding him to tight . so i decided to let him be<br />
<br />
so i ask him to promise me so many thing and he did . well he almost agreed . hahaha . so last monday he start his 1st day at work . i was so worried , but yet i didnt disturb him . i wait till he got home . then i text him and called him . i called him few times but he didnt answer . few hours later he tell me dat he was a asleep bcoz too tired . im pity at him , i feel sorry for disturbing him<br />
<br />
even he is busy , he still spend time with me . we talk at least once a day . maigadd i miss him so much . really miss him . wont be seeing him during my sem break . maigadd i miss you mannispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-80409877912089591922014-09-20T14:58:00.005+08:002014-09-20T14:59:35.807+08:00have some gut dude<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">i used to think that keeping old photos
taken with ex are cute <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">as it can be use to show to our next
generation<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">but as i grown up<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">it started to seem useless , ridiculous
and nonsense<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">the more I keep it , the more it burden me<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It make me feel like I forgot him already <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">but the truth is not 100% deleted yet<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so I google up on tips how to forget ex or
make him vanished forever from memories<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1<sup>st</sup> thing I learn is to delete
his phone number<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">at 1<sup>st</sup> I think I dnt have to
delete it cuz he maybe cntact me back<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">and im right cuz he really does look for
me <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">after a short period I started to realize
that this things aint got any progression<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">cuz everytime he look for me he knw I can
recognize him<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">he might think im still waiting for him
*hell no*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so started to deleted his phone number<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">when he call I pretend to not recognize
his voice although I knw dat was his number<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so he think I already forget him<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">it become more fun when he reduces his
calls<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">at last im in peace<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">but that didn’t work 100% cuz I still keep
all those photos with him <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">during google’ing’ those tips the 2<sup>nd</sup>
steps is to deleted all softcopy photos and throw all the hardcopy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">at 1<sup>st</sup> I dnt really wanna do it cuz it make me feel “ahh
rugi lahh all these memories got to throw”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so I decided to keep it for a while<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">after a while I feel like im not true enaf
for sam<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">the situation is like I still hoping for
my ex even I have him<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so I took some guts and deleted those
photos<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">for the hardcopy I didn’t throw it easily
in the dustbin<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">but I decided to burn in<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">therefore I burn all those memories<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">and guess what <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">after all that I started to smile on my
own and congratulate myself<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3<sup>rd</sup> steps is to throw all the
things he gave me<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">and I did without hesitation<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">he gave me his HR tshirt , a DOMO tshirt
and a NIKE tshirt<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I thrown the HR<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">the other 2 I didn’t do anything cuz I couldn’t
find it <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">*due to my messy room*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">but I swear ill throw it once I find it<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">so have some gut and do these thing<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">throw yr ex away</span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-small;">to mr. Ex *<strike>which I knw wont read this as
he didn’t knw my blog</strike>*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-small;">I AM HAPPIER WITHOUT YOU BECAUSE I AM WITH
A BETTER PERSON WHO LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-size: x-small;">AND HE DIDN’T CHEAT ON ME JUST BECAUSE WE
HAVE TO STAY APART</span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><u>to dear love , thanks to all yr love and
affection , Im glad to knw you , cuz when im with you I become a better person
. I love you for all that you are , all that you had been and all that you yet
to be</u></b></span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-44888881859827413492014-06-15T11:20:00.001+08:002014-06-15T11:20:15.908+08:00blog ni lahh tempat aku mencoret segala isi hati aku . blog ni lahh menjadi saksi airmata aku . peneman aku masa kecewa . masa takdak tempat nak mengadu , blog lahh tempat paling dekat nak dicapai . tp sejak ada pesbuk , wechat aku dh tak sentuh pun blog . kesian blog aku . kalaulaa dia hidup msti dia kecewa dgn aku . maafkan aku blog . in sha allah lps ni aku kerap kerap update apapa kat sini oke . aku bukan apa , aku malas nak bukak lappy :) nak tulih kat tab tak syiok , tak feel nak taip laju2 cm slalu .nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-35129356949327202732014-06-14T16:27:00.003+08:002014-06-15T11:09:16.094+08:002 tahun 3 bulan 1 hariharini genap 2 tahun 3 bulan 1 hari<br />
and harini jugak dia kata dia tawaq hati dgn aku<br />
salah aku ka ya allah<br />
salah aku ka<br />
teruk sngt ka perangai aku ni<br />
sampai dia tak tahan dgn aku<br />
ya allah<br />
bahagiakanlah dia<br />
walau bukan dgn aku ya allah<br />
aku rela apa saja demi kebahagiaan dia<br />
<br />
setelah dua tahun bersama<br />
cukup la dia terseksa dgn aku ya allah<br />
kurniakan lah dia kebahagiaan<br />
biar aku yg tanggung segala duka ni ya allah<br />
aku cuma mahukan yg terbaik buat dia<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>buat abang, </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>abang , maafkan ayg . ayg bukan terbaik utk abg . abg , ayg rela kalau abg dh tawar hati dgn ayg . ayg rela abg cari yg lain . cari lah yg lagi baik dr ayg . ayg nak tgk abg bahagia . maafkan ayg sb ayg selalu buat abg sakit hati , selalu buat abg marah . abg , ayg taktau abg nk buat surprise kt ayg . ayg ingt nk pegi tesco dgn wann tuu sb nak ajak dia teman ayg . ayg tak sehat abg . ayg demam . sb tu ayg tak nak pegi mna sorg2 . ayg tkot apapa jd kt ayg nt susah . lg pun mak tau ayg nak pi kat wann ja . ayg mintak maaf abg . maafkan ayg sb dh buat abg marah . semoga abg sentiasa happy . bukan niat ayg nak mengalah dan lepaskan abg pd org lain . cuma ayg rsa klau kehadiran ayg dlm hidup abg tak membahagiakan abg , baiklah ayg beri abg peluang utk bersama dgn org yg lebih layak kan . ayg bukan mengalah abg . cuma ayg nk abg bahagia . ayg pernah kata kan , klau demi kebahagiaan abg ayg rela buat apa saja . abg , ayg syg sngt hubungan kita ni . sb dgn abg ayg boleh jd diri ayg . abg lyn ayg baik sgt selama ni . abg hiburkan ayg . abg bahagiakan ayg . abg tau tak , tgk abg tidur lena pun ayg dh cukup bahagia . abg , abg dh cukup bahagiakan ayg dh abg . abg bahagiakan diri abg pulak laa . jgn fikir ayg ja . ayg boleh jaga dri ayg . abg buat lah apa yg terbaik utk diri abg . andai abg dh jumpa pengganti diri ayg . bgtau lah ayg dgn cra yg ayg dh tetap kan tuu . in sha allah ayg sanggup terima apa saja demi kebahagiaan abg . </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i> salam sayang dari ayang</i>nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-87696240369474915022013-11-26T17:00:00.002+08:002013-11-26T17:00:31.806+08:00Penatnyerr , penat menung jaa . Bru 2 hari start sem baru . Teramat boring sampai taktau nak buat apa . But masuk 2nd day ni dh ada homework dh . Tutorial chemist dgn lab report chemist . Ohmyy , lab report dh la kena buat dua graph . Sadis btoi laa :( nampak nya aku akan kembali aktif lahh lps ni . Aktif berhomework --' blog nii not sure lah sampai bila boleh di update mcm ni , slagi tak bnyk assgment slagi tu laa boleh diupdate kot . Tm wifi plak x dpt , x leh nk berfb , insta , and so on so berblog jelahh dgn service kmph student nihh . Grrrr . Disebablam semalam aku pengsan awai iaitu sejurus selepas azan isyak , maka harini aku nk tangguh semua keja buat mlm ni so that aku tak tidoq awai sgt . Kui2 . Tdoq awai pun buat aku berjaga tghmlm buat apa kann , then dlm kls ngntuk mcm apa g . Hehehe . Mummy nk mai bulan 12 nii , tak sabaq ceqq . Rindunyaa kt adk2 tuu . Klau buleh tgk anak2 tam mesti lg syiokk .nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-76395786917075388512013-11-26T13:48:00.001+08:002013-11-26T13:48:28.117+08:00Kdg kdg aku berharap sgt allah tarik segala ingatan aku , biar aku tak ingat pun rasa sakit bercinta . Kdg2 aku menyesal sgt tak ikut ckp mak , jgn bcinta slagi blum waktunya . Tp aku dh tlanjur bercinta , and aku dh syg sgt kt dia , aku tak sampai hati nk lupakan sgala knangan indah kaminispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-50802855140762129792013-11-26T13:41:00.001+08:002013-11-26T13:41:06.356+08:00Allah maha besarnispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-3086561968188297782013-11-26T13:36:00.001+08:002015-03-31T03:41:17.341+08:00Hancur hati aku , snang nya dia buat aku mcm ni . Setiap ayat yg dia kt tu mencucuk2 ja aku asa . Perit sgt . Dia dh berubah . Betul dia kata dia dh berubah . Patot laa . Dh makin tak fikir hati and prasaan aku . Klau sblum ni aku wt prangai cm tu takde lah dia mrh sgt , just dia tak lyn aku then dia kta lantak lahh . Itu je . Skrg ni dh naik suara dgn aku , kata kt aku apa yg aku tak puas hati sgt , smua dia buat smua tak kena kt mta aku . Ye aku ngaku aku slh , tp tak pyh la guna ayat cm tu , nada kasar . Kan ke boleh je ckp elok2 dgn aku . Td bila dia ckp mcm tu cpt2 aku nk ltak fon , aku bg alasan org azan sdgkan org dh azan sblm tu j, aku tak sanggup nk bg dia dgr aku nangis , biar lah aku yg tahan perit sakit hati aku ni . Biarlah aku berdosa tipu dia dri dia dgr aku nangis . Biarlah dia nak marah aku tipu dia pun . Biarlah dia marah aku . Aku sanggup kne marah hari2 asalkan dia tak tinggalkan aku . Aku akan pegang janji aku tuu . Sampai bila bila . Apapun demi kebahagiaan dia . Dia pnah ckp kt aku klau x bahagia dgn dia cri je org lain . Msa tu aku rsa hina sgt . Mcm cinta aku slama ni tak bermakna je utk dia smpai snang2 je dia ckp cm tu . Lps dh mcm2 ktorang lalui bersama takan sebab bnd kcik je aku nk tinggalkan dia . Klau btul aku nk tinggalkan dia , ptotnya dri msa dia abaikan aku msa form 5 dlu aku dh tinggalkan dia , sdgkan aku sggup tggu dia msa tu . Takkan tetiba skrg ni aku nk mengalah , aku dh sparuh perjuangan dh .nispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2509323973025811640.post-13061001855514724332013-11-24T23:56:00.002+08:002013-11-24T23:56:57.421+08:00AdeyyySepanjang 1 taon 8 bulan 12 hari kitorang bersama ni dh few time dy ckp kt aku if aku tak happy dgn dy jgn pksa dri . Dia sruh aku pegi cri org lain yg bokeh bhagia kn aku . Dia tak tau yg everytime dia kta mcm tu hati aku sakit sgt , mna tak sakit . Aku dh syg dia mcm nk gila dh tetiba dia boleh plak ckp mcm tu . Sabo je laa . Dia tak tau kot yg dia lah sb aku nangis , dia lah sb aku ktawa . Mcm mna aku nk bhgia dgn org lain klau hati aku mlik dia . Myb slh aku kot sb tlalu kongkong hdup dia smpai dia rsa x bhgia dgn aku . hummm sedih sgt bila dia kta mcm unispipahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06790253855833309002noreply@blogger.com0